Series “Modern Relationship Advice from the Bible”
Sermon Conversation “Parting Ways”
Acts 15
Rev. Dr. Todd Salmi, Pastor
United Campus Ministry at Texas State University

In 2007, I was living in Central Mexico
and I distinctly remember one day, in the back garden,
I was listening to the US News over the internet
And this was before podcasts and all that
So I was just listening to a daily program from Austin
And there was one 10 minute news feature called
“The End of the End of Friendships”

Now this was 13 years ago, so while social media wasn’t new
It also wasn’t as ingrained in everything we do.
The author of the article said
one of the unanticipated effects of social media
would be that we would never lose a friend again
and that this would be a bad thing.

He said that normally, as we transition between life,
As we moved between places, schools and jobs
That, before social media, you would likely lose contact
because of the effort required to keep those friends.

But now with social media, that is flipped –
And it is a radical flip – because if you don’t do anything
You’re more likely to stay connected to your
“friends” and “follower” than meet new people
because meeting new people requires work
and opening social media just doesn’t.

The odd result is now we’re more likely to be connected
to that person we had one class with during 8th grade
with their photos, their feed, their political options,
than we know about most of the people around us.

Tonight we’ll continue our conversation about
Modern Relationships Advice from the Bible
And tonight we’re going to talk about “Parting Ways”

Thats right, we’re going to talk about ending friendships.
The church tends to emphasize over and over
How you need to be friends with everyone,
How you need to forgive and reconcile after arguments
And all that is good, but it can leave us feeling like
As Christians – we should never end a friendship.

But the Bible tells us there are times
when we just ‘part ways’ with people in our lives.
So tonight, we join Scripture in the Book of Acts
Which tells the story of the early church.

And to get some context,
In Acts 15, all the church leaders gather in Jerusalem
and they need to figure out what to do with
the new apostles, who weren’t part of the original 12,
and who have started preaching Jesus beyond the Jews in Israel.

Acts 15: 12 The whole assembly became silent as they listened to Barnabas and Paul telling about the signs and wonders God had done among the Gentiles through them.

In this verse, Barnabas and Paul tell the church elders
About their ministry – and it is amazing.

Throughout the early part of Acts,
Barnabas and Paul are the Jesus wonder team –
They work together to plant churches
They work together to withstand persecution
They work together to bring people to Christ
And in Acts 14 – before this passage –
Barnabas is called an Apostle
And Barnabas’s name is listed before Paul
Just like Barnabas is listed first in this passage.

And ultimately the church elders
conclude the Holy Spirit is at work in this ministry of Barnabas and Paul
And they are given a letter of approval…

For years, Barnabas and Paul have worked together
And they are like best friends,
and then we arrive at Verse 36.
”Some time later Paul said to Barnabas,
’Let us go back and visit the believers
in all the towns where we preached
the word of the Lord and see how they are doing.’
Barnabas wanted to take John, also called Mark, with them,
but Paul did not think it wise to take him, because he had deserted them in Pamphylia
and had not continued with them in the work.
They had such a sharp disagreement that they parted company.
Barnabas took Mark and sailed for Cyprus,
but Paul chose Silas and left,
commended by the believers to the grace of the Lord.”

So Paul wants to go back – to take a victory lap
and check on the churches he and Barnabas planted.

Barnabas is cool with this plan,
And then suggests they bring John, also called Mark, with them.

And while this happened 2000 years ago;
this is relatable content
Have you ever made plans with a friend,
gotten super excited about it,
and then they show up at the door
with a surprise third wheel with them?
“Hey, so I heard what we were doing
and wanted to tag along – is that cool?”

So you can imagine Paul being like –
Ugh, that dude always shows up,
never pays his fair share, just kinda mooches,
and then bails midway.
And I guess at this point, Paul has had it.

And Paul tells his friend Barnabas,
Remember when we were at the IHOP late one night
In Pamphilia and John ordered all that food
And ate it but then said he had to leave before the check arrived
and we had to cover his meal?

And they argue – and Scripture says they part ways.

And you never hear about Barnabas again.

That’s it. Unfriended and Unfollowed. No more mention about him again in Acts.

This doesn’t erase the friendship –
In fact, the ministry friendship of Barnabas and Paul
is recorded in Holy Scripture –
Their work together is recorded in Acts,
It is celebrated by the church,
It was an amazing season in the Holy Spirit,
And yet, over time and in a new season –
This particular friendship ended.
Each headed in their different direction

And that’s ok.

There are times when we move into different seasons
Different directions, different groups of people,
Different interests and different Goals.
And sometimes, we need to let go of certain friendships
To free us forward –
to be more present
To the new thing God is doing…

And so our sermon conversation question for tonight is:

Who do you need to part ways with?

(The congregation rearranges the chairs and breaks into small group conversations to discuss this question for five minutes. After five minutes, Pastor Todd invites three groups to report back to everyone what they talked about. The Todd concludes the sermon conversation)

Typically, we are the heroes in our own stories
And heroes always love a good villain.
So what’s interesting in the Bible passage
Is that Barnabas and Paul parted ways
And it seems to be because of this flaky person
John Mark.

And this passage portrays Paul
as blessed forward in ministry with Silas.

But Barnabas and John Mark also go forward.
And here’s the thing – in church traditions –
The Gospel of Mark is attributed as authored by
this apostle – John, who is also called Mark.

While Paul is called to continue traveling
Always on the move through all the various churches
Who only seems to stop and write while imprisoned,
God called John Mark to a different path,
A path of making a written record
Writing down the Good News of Jesus Christ
And placing Barnabas to help him
and then share that text with the communities
and what a gift the Gospel of Mark is to us.

It is the Biblical witness that we do NOT have to always
stay best friends with every friend we’ve ever had.

Sometimes we’re called to part ways
As we take different paths that God has planted in our lives.

Let’s Pray..